Serving the SU Hill Thursday October 26 1995 **************************************** New e-mail names for Jeff if he ever gets creative enough to get involved. SchnelScape Hot Jewva Fuzzilla ...add your own ------------------------------------------- In a recent report Eric Yo has been filming love scenes with the Unknown THai girl. Facts can prove that UTGirl especially wrote the part for eric. Coaxing him into her bedroom for special acting lessons Yo was forced to do the dirty deed. UTGirl was quoted as saying just like in the big apple this summer. ------------------------------------------- Crazy shawnna was spotted in the HBC computer cluster making strange scary faces at her computer screen, when asked what ahe was doing, she replied "What are you talking about this is my normal expression." ------------------------------------------- Cable announced today that he is changing the spelling of his name to K-bull. This is an obvious attempt to seem more macho. k-bull-shit? You decide. ------------------------------------------- Joy witsmissedher has been missing in action some say that she has been abducted by aliens, others believe that she is just hiding in a tree. ------------------------------------------- Magic lessons will be taught by Fuzzerella this Friday at the Regatta all are welcome to attend, free admission, come see the boy wonder dazzle and amaze all as he works his magic with the ladies. ------------------------------------------- Results from the Vatch Contest!!! are in thanks to all that voted, and for those who didn't dont worry you can still be in for Jeff's. Madpissedscape wins by a landslide. ------------------------------------------- Seven is still playing at the Hoyts, hang in there contenders. ------------------------------------------- and now.....ladies and gentlemen I present. The Best of Cleaning my E-mail Sent-Mail Folder =-=-=-=-=-==-=-=-=-=-===-=-=-==-=-=-=-=-=-= *************************************** * * " A day without the FUZZ is a day that never was " * * *************************************** I will not burp in class I will not draw naked ladies in class They are laughing at me, not with me I will not get very far with this attitude I will not make flatulent noises in class I will not hide behind the Fifth Amendment I will not sleep through my education Underwear should be worn on the inside I will not bring sheep to class I will not eat things for money The principal's toupee is not a frisbee ------------------------------------------- I was kidnapped by j krug, leader of the iranian terrorist movement he forced me to listen to michael jackson until i passed out. ------------------------------------------- Q: Ey, Jesas! What ya gonna do on Good Friday? A: I dunno. Just hangin' 'round ******************************* * * "You can New Jack Sue-Ng on my nuts" * * * -Cool E-Yo!! * ******************************* "I can't catch AIDS TWICE can I?" Let me know if you taste anything funny down there. Could you fish out that tampon I lost last month? "I'm done now, you can get off." Move your head I can't see the T.V. "Really - it's only a cold sore." Be gentle, please. This is my first time - with a human being. I called Arvid and told him he could take his lousy sublet and funk it. I wonder who wold win if there was a colosal battle East vs. West. Thailand meets Jerusalim! THE FUZZ Vs. THE VATCH Jeff is smaller but Paulie has no balance, a simple leg sweep could have the vatch floundering on the ground, however a swing in Jeff's direction could cause his nose to bleed for a week. ?? And then there is the misterious Yo, whose side will he rush to? Will he be caught in the middle? Stay tuned for the further adventures of University Area Apartments part Deux. Subject: UU Fool Eric congratulations on your performance on the UU TV version of Wheel of Fortune. I happened to catch it the other night. I can't tell you how cool you looked dancing with your homies. Too bad you didn't get to play the game. Better Luck Next Time. P.S. you got to show me those moves some time. ------------------------------------------- My Quote for Today. Crazy Indians, and Unknown Thai Hoochie. ------------------------------------------- Actually I hear that all the tools and herbs are attracted to Thailanders. In fact I hear that there are more losers in one square mile of Thailand soil that in all of University Area Apartments. That is correct you read it here first that Thailand has highest concentration on the planet. Medically, I am of course Dr. Wazzy Wu, Commander In Chief, the boss stating the facts, and in lay terms for those of you not versed in complexities at hand I will put it simply. The sweat glands found on Vatchpole excrete chemical toxins that when activated with enzymes form a catalyst solution capable of attracting those persons in society not fully accepted. It appears in one case study that these dregs of the community have flocked to one apartment complex all due to the in habitant of one native thailander with an extremely high density of sweat glands. I speak first hand when I recount these facts. On a particulary hot night, Mr. V I will call him. Was sweating profusly and even proceded to open his front door in hopes to cool down. Not more than 30 seconds later did Dork1 appear that the door step. Following him an even bigger dork King Tool he was named entered. It is pure and simple. The only defense for poor Mr. V is to take at least 4 showers a day, and cooking lots of smelly food in order to mask his scent. ------------------------------------------- Eric you are definitly going to be the poster boy for the Dork Page. On Thu, 14 Sep 1995, E/Vog wrote: dude, your web page blows. ha ha. "So, what TV should we hook the cable to?" - Friendsly Adelphia Cable Man "Ahhh, doesn't matter, we're going to split it anyway" - Ha from the Suite ------------------------------------------- More Headlines at Comstock Heights Want Ads Need Girlfriend -fuzz Sports Vatch goes hypeless in bottom of ninth. Yo breaks consecutive Senior Sunday record. On Mon, 18 Sep 1995, E/Vog wrote: d.o. says three big headlines today... 1. NATHAN WU == MEANY ON THE WEB! 2. PAULIE HYPES UP THE HYPE, ONLY TO FALL SHORT. 3. FUZZY DOESN'T HOOK UP AGAIN! EXPERTS BLAME LACK OF SCARF. ------------------------------------------- Bad Ratchy vs. Vatchole-e-o on pay-per-view live at Acropolis! ------------------------------------------- Fuzzy I am going to hang velcro from the ceiling so when you try to leave your apartment you will stick like a dead fly. ------------------------------------------- afterwards on nachos with a red face. The girl can't hang....I'm gonna dress that bitch with a skirt and lipstick tomorrow.. word 'em up. i am the hot stepper [that is 4 u paulie] P.S. nice fuckin bags around her eyes. ------------------------------------------- Thanks Wazi, just declare it to the world...you know she's on my list asshole? ------------------------------------------- thats all for now.... see ya tuesday with the complete weekend wrap up. ------------------------------------------- |