Thursday November 9

***** Winter Wonderland ****

- Top 5 Ways to keep warm in the Snow -

5) Wear a scarf.

4) Don't go to class.

3) Light yourself on fire.

2) Eat spicy noodles.

1) Grow lots of FUZZ!

***** Snow Sentiments *****

"Why is it everytime I walk to class it starts to snow?, Funk That!"

-Eric'Ice Ice Baby'Yo

***** Jingle Bells *****

Fuzzerella reports - The bar scene was packed last night despite the cold weather. "Dude they were all over me."

***** Lost in Action ******

Snow Panic has hit the SU Hill. After the recent snow storm the campus police have reported a missing student. His name is Ratch Pole. He was last seen going to class but never arrived according to one SU teacher.

"I noticed that he wasnt sleeping in class as usual" - Professer Sibert.

In an all out attempt Chancellor Shaw has autorized the release of the dogs. Not any dogs but special noodle sniffing dogs will be used to find Mr. Pole. The search continues please report any spotings.

***** Congrats Little Willy *****

The newest member of the intel team, Bill P6 Pro what's up Bro!

"Now If only Stevie Ray Vaughn were to come back from the grave my life would be complete" - P6 Willy II the adventure continues.

***** Hey Fat Face *****

Cruel and unusual punishment awaits those SU students with eating disorders. One poor individual that was fighting her way back from death reported being called a fat face. Nibby we will call her to hide her identity was recovering from anerexia and a bad personality when one student asked her if she had recently had dental surgury. No why she asked. Because yo face is so fat he answered. If you happen to see ol chubby cheeks around campus please give her a compliment.

**Pole spotting**

A description of someone looking 'madpissed' was seen late this afternoon he was heading towards the quad mumbleing "Dude she slapped me in the face with her..." The search goes on.

**** Joy Watch ****

Witsmissedher was once again spotted. For those that thought she was out of commission beware, she prowels again. The latest episode takes place in the bird Library, yes this eye witness was caught off gurard by seeing Joy in such unnatural habitat. Reports conclude that she mad a mistake and walked in by accident. Once inside she was seen asking people where the bar was.

She approached several people and said "would you like to grab a beer with me?"

Later she was seen leaving alone, better luck next time!

***** Classified *****


Bacon Wave, CutCo knives, Columbo Movies

- Contact Steve FiberChunks Horgan

Flobie Hair Vaccume Device

- Contact the FuZZ.

Bad Stories and Poems


****** Reader Response *****

>From mjmalady@mailbox.syr.eduThu Nov 9 23:37:44 1995

in reference to the the fashion thing, I will win. oh yes, the title will be mine.

***** Special Attachment *****

here is the old flava for your ears

At Dream Girls - A Lap Dance is crazy cool

***Hookin' up***

Everyone who has been to the sour suite and looked at Matt's door knows that they have been taking a tally of the number times Fuzz has hooked up this academic, his lifetime. It was empty for a longwhile until the number -32 was added. This is due to the rumor that he has succumbed to the pressures of some chick named rosey and her five friends. The police have been on the back of the editors of this newspaper in order to find out more on this topic. If anyone has any information about Fuzzy and his hook-ups please contact editor-in-chief Wu

or dial 1-800-justlikemom or 1-800-fluffernutter. Please, no Fuzzy rumors because there are just too many to handle. Also, you may add to the Tally below.

# times Fuzz has hooked up



* empty *



In celebration of the one month anniversary of the name change of the Artist Formerly Known as "ARIE" now and still known as Cable or by the symbol "?" Paulie has decided to change his name also. He has had the name for 20 1/2 yrs and is finally also sick of it and cannot take it anymore. So here are some suggestions for his new name...Please feel free to add to the list, but make sure you vote for your favorite one.

Vatchy Srinuan

Madpissed Srinuan

Uptownbeatdown Srinuan

Pole Srinuan

Fuckfuzzy Srinuan

SpicyThaiNoodle Srinuan

***Music Review***

As you all have known, FuzzmasterFluff has come out with his long awaited mix tape "Straight outta Fluffcyde". With D.J. Velcro at his side, the boy can't lose, or be separated when standing too close. "Straight outta Fluffside" was a freestyle session inside a Dave the Rave House party a bumbling mix of phat islamic beats and samples, blunted interludes and lyrical gymnastics. Coming off his debut album "Dreaming of Jew" which hit concrete status, he has improved on his image. Now his rhymes talk about things which are not often touched upon in hiphop: rejection, fear, lack of any STD's, or even the joy of masturbation. This album shows how he is staying true to his homeland and not selling out to sex.

You can't front on the boy, because step to him lyrically and and his boys will step up. Backing him up on the vocals are the acclaimed m.c's M.C. M.J.X.M.A.L.A.D.Y.S.C.M.E.W.H.O.U.S.E.B.B.A.L.L.F.A.N. AND his sidekick Cable (?). Masterfluff's first cut, "CompSci Groupie" is the first of many joints on female trouble in the major. this album focuses on big bass and drum kicks amongst subtle layers of keyboards and vocal samples.

But the track that resonates deepest here is "Palestinian Music." The chorus--"I'm a proud Jew / I thought you knew / Now that you do / is it possible if I can do you / Just for a moment / That's what I have chosen / Already my dick has spoken / PLEASE PLEASE AMY.....PLEASE PLEASE AMY.....Won't you be my baby..." This shit iz gonna blow up!!!

Right back in his fucking face.

WuScape rates this phat joint 3 1/2 mics down.

***** Quotes *****

"Fuzzy dont play that"


are you gonna bark all day, little doggy, or are you gonna bite?


If they didn't do, what I told them not to do. they'd still be alive:

Maybe the're dead, maybe their not, and either the cops got 'em, or they



I'm out of time so Till next time...